To set goals or not to set goals, that is the question
The thing about lists and goals is that they're tiring. Especially when I decide that I want complete a task each day no matter how late I have to stay up to do it. Last week I stayed up until 12 or 12:30 Monday through Wednesday in order to get my critiques done. (don't forget, I get up at 5 AM) Thursday my husband suggested we have dinner out and of course I was all over that. I'm the only one who cooks and a night off is great. "No problem," said I. "I'll just swap my Thurs and Fri goals." (Fri was the night off.)
The problem was that I had a very frustrating day at work on Friday and, coincidentally, so did my husband. He and I both needed to vent in the HUGEST way and so out to dinner we went and for a nice long drive so we could continue our chat. The week had taken a toll on both of us. When we got home we watched an hour of TV and could barely hold our eyes open. So, no critique Fri night either. One behind.
Saturday I was too tired to work on one before my OCC meeting (I'm gone from 9:30 AM to 3 PM) and afterwards we realized (oops!) that Sunday was Mother's Day and he had no gift for his mother and we hadn't firmed up our plans for Mother's Day either. So Saturday night was gone and still no critique. Two behind. Sunday was Mother's Day which I completely forgot about when I made my list last week. We pretty much spent the whole day with our moms (+ his brother & sister and their spouses and kids) which was actually really fun. Have I mentioned how smitten I am with my new little niece, Elise? It really cannot be said enough. :) Anyway, it was a full day by the time I did laundry and grocery shopping. No critique Sunday either--three behind--which is where I sit now. Until tomorrow when another scene is posted and I'm 4 behind yet again.
"So where is THIS week's list?" you may wonder. I wonder too. I guess the list from last week made me wary. As I said before, I'm an all or nothing kind of girl. Mon-Wed I was ALL and Thurs-Sat I was nothing. Sunday I was back to ALL again but didn't have time to plan a new list of goals. Monday was seriously blown by the season finale of Grey's Anatomy. 3 hours of bliss on TV. I NEVER do that but I can't get enough of that show.
Well, it's really never to late to set goals. It's ok that I blew off this week, right? I can make up for it this weekend. Maybe even tonight if Commander in Chief isn't on. (I allow myself Grey's Anatomy and Commander in Chief on the TV front. All other shows I can take or leave besides the occasional episode of Lost.) This weekend I will do one JCW critique and do poor Michele's critique because I've owed it to her for like a month. Granted she wasn't writing during that time, but she might have been on her good days if she had my critique in front of her spurring her on, right?
So, that's it, short and sweet. One critique Saturday and one Sunday. We usually go out on Fridays so that's a my free night. Tonight (depending on how much time I have) I'll work on a crit or rewrite some more of my chapter 2. I actually worked on the ch 2 rewrite at lunch yesterday and am pleased about how scene 3 is coming along.
If anyone's out there following along, how do you keep yourself motivated to meet your goals? Are you "all or nothing" like me? Slow and steady? Somewhere in between? I'm fascinated by this. As you can see by my Enneagram symbol on the right of the page, I'm a type 4. My friend Barb (the Enneagram expert) often says that 4's are always trying to understand themselves and that's certainly true for me. I guess I feel like if I understand why I am the way I am, it'll help me figure out why I do what I do and from there perhaps I can change the things I don't like, accept the things I can't change, and embrace the stuff that I do like, or at least the stuff that makes me uniquely me. I'm learning after 37 years that some things can't be changed, just accepted and some stuff I really shouldn't want to change anyway.
Current Mood: reflective
The problem was that I had a very frustrating day at work on Friday and, coincidentally, so did my husband. He and I both needed to vent in the HUGEST way and so out to dinner we went and for a nice long drive so we could continue our chat. The week had taken a toll on both of us. When we got home we watched an hour of TV and could barely hold our eyes open. So, no critique Fri night either. One behind.
Saturday I was too tired to work on one before my OCC meeting (I'm gone from 9:30 AM to 3 PM) and afterwards we realized (oops!) that Sunday was Mother's Day and he had no gift for his mother and we hadn't firmed up our plans for Mother's Day either. So Saturday night was gone and still no critique. Two behind. Sunday was Mother's Day which I completely forgot about when I made my list last week. We pretty much spent the whole day with our moms (+ his brother & sister and their spouses and kids) which was actually really fun. Have I mentioned how smitten I am with my new little niece, Elise? It really cannot be said enough. :) Anyway, it was a full day by the time I did laundry and grocery shopping. No critique Sunday either--three behind--which is where I sit now. Until tomorrow when another scene is posted and I'm 4 behind yet again.
"So where is THIS week's list?" you may wonder. I wonder too. I guess the list from last week made me wary. As I said before, I'm an all or nothing kind of girl. Mon-Wed I was ALL and Thurs-Sat I was nothing. Sunday I was back to ALL again but didn't have time to plan a new list of goals. Monday was seriously blown by the season finale of Grey's Anatomy. 3 hours of bliss on TV. I NEVER do that but I can't get enough of that show.
Well, it's really never to late to set goals. It's ok that I blew off this week, right? I can make up for it this weekend. Maybe even tonight if Commander in Chief isn't on. (I allow myself Grey's Anatomy and Commander in Chief on the TV front. All other shows I can take or leave besides the occasional episode of Lost.) This weekend I will do one JCW critique and do poor Michele's critique because I've owed it to her for like a month. Granted she wasn't writing during that time, but she might have been on her good days if she had my critique in front of her spurring her on, right?
So, that's it, short and sweet. One critique Saturday and one Sunday. We usually go out on Fridays so that's a my free night. Tonight (depending on how much time I have) I'll work on a crit or rewrite some more of my chapter 2. I actually worked on the ch 2 rewrite at lunch yesterday and am pleased about how scene 3 is coming along.
If anyone's out there following along, how do you keep yourself motivated to meet your goals? Are you "all or nothing" like me? Slow and steady? Somewhere in between? I'm fascinated by this. As you can see by my Enneagram symbol on the right of the page, I'm a type 4. My friend Barb (the Enneagram expert) often says that 4's are always trying to understand themselves and that's certainly true for me. I guess I feel like if I understand why I am the way I am, it'll help me figure out why I do what I do and from there perhaps I can change the things I don't like, accept the things I can't change, and embrace the stuff that I do like, or at least the stuff that makes me uniquely me. I'm learning after 37 years that some things can't be changed, just accepted and some stuff I really shouldn't want to change anyway.
Current Mood: reflective
Labels: me
posted by Cherry Red at 8:56 PM
5 Comments:
I'm just sooo glad to see you posting again!
As for the other stuff... I use the "death?" method. Seriously. I have my list of things that I really want to get done. I have a certain ballpark time of the day that I would like to be done with stuff. If I reach that time, I think "Is a death going to occur if I haven't completed this by tomorrow?" Well, since NOTHING in my life anymore has any death deadlines, I can go to sleep with no real guilt. The most that happens is that I try really hard the next day. The only thing I'm fairly certain on is my 'cutoff' time. It's nice to know that no matter how much I've gotten done (or not) I MUST stop working at this time. Then I have time to just relax before bed. I just can't sleep if I'm too keyed up!
I'm also a Enneagram 4, and/or a Myers-Briggs ENFP. The FP thing means lists are something I make and don't pay a lot of attention to because I am flexible girl--plans change suddenly? No problema--and goals are broad ideas of things I want to accomplish eventually.
Right now, I have a whiteboard listing everything I want/need to do in the near future. No dates. No timeframes. Just stuff listed mostly so I don't forget it altogether.
I'll get to it all, but I'll get to it in the flow of my life, when I get to it. One item has an outside deadline, but that's 10 days away, and a few other things are have people waiting (including JCW critiques), but I'll get to it all when I get to it...
Katy, who can be led but not driven, not even by herself
Interesting Katy.
I'm an INFJ and I do lists all the time. If I don't do lists I forget stuff. Not sure why I feel guilt if I don't get stuff on my list done (which leads to pressure on myself and stress) Perhaps it's my Catholic upbringing... or my Italian grandmother--she was great at guilt. :)
I like the whiteboard idea. A big whiteboard with a black frame would look good on the red walls of my office. We've been meaning to purchase one for a while. I like the no due date idea. The list is there--I'll see it every day-- and stuf'll get done eventually. Thanks for the tip.:)
Kim:), trying not to be All Or Nuthin'
I just took the Enneagram test for the first time, and the Myers-Briggs again. Haven't taken that one in about 10 years, but I'm still an INFP. I'm an Enneagram 2, and the description seems to fit. Never really thought of myself that way before. Now I'll have some re-examining to do.
Dee,
Didn't see your message here so I gabbed about this over on your blog. My "J" is not a very string one, so you and I have a great deal in common personality-wise.
I'm also a lot like Katy too, except for the Introvert/Extrovert thing. My "I" is a very solid "I".
KIm:)
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